1066 All Stars

End of week 15 - 13th December

Starting weight - 12st 4lb

Last weight - 11st 3lb

New weight - 11st 3lb

Comments

* Disappointing weigh in but could have been far worse. I always weigh myself twice to validate the result. First time I stepped on, it said 11st 4lbs, which came as a bit of a shock. Second time, it said 11st 2lbs. Then finally 3rd and 4th times it said 11st 3lbs, which I settled on as being the true value.

* I really want to get down to 11st but these last 2/3 pounds are proving difficult to shift. There is a two part problem. 1) the combination of Christmas and length of regime have caused me to give in to the occassional snack desire. 2) I think I am reaching the limit of weight loss without fundamental changes to my exercise regime, which I simply don't have the time or desire to implement.

* There are parallels with other activities though. I recently returned to Football Manager, having not played it for several months. I enjoy FM but it causes me an immense amount of anxiety, which is why I started a blog on the Sports Interactive forums to monitor my feelings as I play. One of the themes that come out of that is an impatience to be better, to reach my target (the Premier League) but always with the thought at the back of my mind that whatever I achieve will never be enough.

And so it is with my weight. I expect to have lost weight because I want to. The reality is that, without significant lifestyle changes, I am at or near my natural weight. I can still achieve my goal but, realistically, it is a long term goal, not a short term one. Being impatient and expecting things to happen before they are ready will just build a resentment. Instead, I must simply focus on what is and forget what has been or what may come.

Or, to put it another way, mindfulness.

* There can be a tendancy with mental health problems to to think, 'other people have it worse than me, what have I got to be depressed about?' But by so doing, we invalidate our own feelings. Circumstances do not have to be compared, they are relative. A broken arm is still a broken arm, even if the guy in the next bed has cancer.

* A few new pieces on the site in the last few days. Why not take some time to check them out;

Jingle Blues - a mental health Christmas carol!

A Mental Healthy Christmas - a poem reviewing my year

Outrunning The Black Dog - an excerpt from my Football Manager blog

You Only Play Once - a retro gaming article

And don't forget my books are on sale at Amazon. Give the gift of mental health this Christmas with one of these stocking fillers.