1066 All Stars

Day 72 - 11th November

Food Log

Breakfast - Some sort of honey grain boulders that the girls didn't like

Lunch - Rice and stir fry veg in chilli sauce

Dinner - Chicken curry with vegtables

Dessert - Yoghurt with chocolate balls

In Between Meal Snacks

* 2x rice cakes

* Handful of grapes

* 2x cocktail sausage

* 5x cherry tomatoes

* Banana

* 2x Go Ahead yoghurt breaks

Thoughts & Feelings

* My snack count has noticeably increased, however they are, with the exception of the sausages, all healthy. I have been very hungry at home in that horrible space between getting home from work and eating dinner, which causes resentment of the plan and makes me want to snack. So I thought I would try front loading the majority of my food, piling it in during the morning. We'll see how it goes, whether it affects my mood and alertness in the afternoon and, crucially, whether it has an adverse affect on my weight.

* One of the consequences of therapy, and coming off of anti-depressants, is that I am noticeably more emotional. Not in a weepy, box of tissues sense but I feel more emotional resonance and empathy with the world around me. This was apparent today as I read a story of a soldier serving on the front line during WW1. In the past this would barely have resonated with me. Now however I found myself connecting with the story, placing myself in his shoes, attempting to resonate with how it must have felt to be in the trenches, watching friends die, no end to the horror in sight. Perhaps this is just the wisdom and maturity that comes with age but I think not. I have changed, I believe for the better.

* I start these blogs during the day and finish off in the evening. Which is a bit of luck because I am absolutely exhausted by the time I get round to this, to the point that tonight, I didn't feel like writing anything. I force myself to do it and once I start, the words flow. I cede to the process, the catharsis of writing, the ebb and flow as the words form naturally, my mind and fingers seemingly operating in perfect synchronicity. Or to put it another way, I enjoy it.

* Balloongate - Grace carried her limp Noddy over to me this morning, pointing at his somewhat deflated stomach. I just want to fix it for her!

* I put my children's story collection together today. I had forgotten some of what I had written and it was nice to revisit them. I really think they are good stories but it seems a waste to publish them just as plain text. I have a friend looking to do some pictures for a couple of the stories which will really add value before self publishing. I would like to get all of the stories in front of a publisher to see if they would have any interest in illustrating and publishing professionally but I've no idea where to start.