1066 All Stars

Life Is What You Make Of It

I have written various posts on my Dad’s death and, understandably I hope, have little desire to revisit the details again.

For context, it is worth just highlighting that it came within a month of starting my new job and three months before our son was born and it is those aspects that I wish to explore.

The last conversation I had with my Dad was in the hospital. He was recovering from his hear...

The More Things Change…

As part of my redundancy, I was afforded the opportunity to see a career advisor to help me back into the workplace. They helped with my CV and online profile amongst other things but the principle thing they stressed was that job offers often come from our own network of contacts. And in a round about way, so it proved.

Finding the recruitment agency process to be a dead end, I made contact with a company that operate...

Get Your Stuff and Get Out

There is a certain wonderful irony to the fact that the single biggest event that happened to me that could drive me into therapy happened whilst I was in therapy. Or, more to the point, just about to leave therapy.

Let’s rewind a little bit. I had taken the step of being open and honest with my employer about my mental health condition. In return, I was assured of support as I worked my way back to full capacity.

License To (Be) Ill

Having accepted that there was a problem, the road to recovery led me to the Priory.

A couple of weeks before I was due to start I went for a visit and to meet my key worker. She asked me a series of questions to get to the bottom of my issues and to give me an outline of what to expect.

To start with, I would do therapy part time. Some days would be all day sessions, others would see me go back to work in the afternoon. I...

Dare To Risk It All

Frustrated with my lack of progression, in 2008 I sought a transfer to our internal risk team. I thought it would give me an opportunity to learn some more technical skills and develop a genuine career path.

I was aware that the department head had a reputation as a whip cracker but I was confident I could handle it. My move kept getting delayed for various reasons but, with a couple of weeks to go until my start date, I went fo...

Here Come The Girls

Having been love’s unlucky loser for so many years, something strange happened around 2002-2003; I kissed a couple of girls.

Now let’s not carried away here, I didn’t suddenly turn into a stallion. We are still very much riding the smooch train here. But I started to feel like I wasn’t a completely unattractive, ugly, fat slob. Actually, I thought I was pretty cool, funny and a decent laugh to be around a...

The Other Karen

Long before I met Karen, there was this girl called Karen. Okay, this getting confusing. Let’s wind back a little bit.

Coming out of University, my experience with the ladies amounted to no more than a drunken snog with one solitary girl. I had no confidence in myself as being in any way attractive but gradually I began to build a semblance of confidence in myself as a person.

Whilst working at the bookies, ...

The last instalment in this series took us through my University years. This time in my life had such a fundamental impact on my future mental well being that, inevitably, I don’t feel as though I did it justice. Hey, I don’t have an editor you know, I just write down whatever words happen to fall out of my brain (scaramanga – see!?). So perhaps I’ll revisit that period again at some point.

In the meantime, having left Uni, I set off into the great un...

With my confidence issues already well ingrained, a lazy summer of 1996 soon gave way to Autumn and attention turned towards University. Truly this would be a life altering experience during an impressionable time in my life, although not quite in the way I expected…

University Challenged

I never expected to go to Uni. During the latter part of the 6th form, the teachers began discussing it with us; where would we go, what would we study? It all seemed for...

In the last instalment, we looked at my present day issues with self esteem and how it impacts on my life, affecting my relationships and outlook. So now let's delve into my murky past as we wend our way through my mental memory lane...

Chunk

Name calling is a part of growing up, almost a rite of passage. Most of us pick up a nickname or two, usually just good natured joshing from your mates.

I was never a hulking great bloater as a kid but I w...